deux filles

The Adventures and Musings of 2 BFFs Separated by a Continent

Pull. Over. 4 August 2010

Filed under: Denise,Road Rage — deniselouise13 @ 5:45 pm
Tags: , , , , , ,

Do you think it would be legal to mount a speaker on my car so I could yell at stupid drivers?  I used to think everyone should have a cell phone in their car that you could dial by using their license plate number.  Now I want a megaphone on top of my car, like the police or the ice cream man.  I can see it now…

“You missed the stop line, dipshit!”

“Nice turn signal, moron!”

“Pick a lane, asshole!”

“You need your lights on, idiot!”

“If your car’s too big for you to park, you need to get a smaller one, dumbass!”

(I feel like I’m channeling Red Foreman from That 70s Show.)

Or best of all, “Get off the phone!” like to the woman I just saw who stopped at an intersection even though she had the right-of-way (via a flashing yellow light) and the rest of us had stop signs, and were waiting oh-so-patiently for her to go.  She waved me and the guy across from me on, and we both pointed at her to GO! I wanted to yell at her (okay, who am I kidding, I did, but in my car), “GET OFF THE PHONE AND PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR TRAFFIC SIGNAL!” Now I could click on my CB radio microphone-thing and say it!  (And again, who am I kidding about turning it on, because it would be on ALL. THE. TIME.)

And THEN, it could rotate, so I can yell at people behind me!

“Get off my ass, bitch, ‘cuz I ain’t goin’ 40 in a 25!”

“Thanks for almost hitting me, are you blind that you didn’t see my turn signal?” (‘Cuz I actually DO use them.) 

Oooo! OR, turn it to the side and blast country music when the pseudo-gangbangers pull up next to me at a stop sign thumping rap!  (Only for wanna-bes, not real ones!) I do this anyway, and even put the window down to let it out but they always have better speakers.  Though my car IS the best stereo I’ve ever had. 

What do you think?  😉


4 Responses to “Pull. Over.”

  1. Deb Says:

    Umm, we are turning into Dad!

  2. fr0st3h Says:

    I couldn’t agree more. To answer your first question, yes. You can mount a megaphone to your car. However, you better have a weapon in your car in case you yell at the wrong person and they follow you and try to hurt you. Many things and people make me angry, but awful drivers are on my top 10 list. My blog has only 3 posts because I just started blogging like 2 days ago. However, 1 of the posts relates to how I hate bad drivers. If you would like to read it, I will warn you, I use EXTREMELY offensive language and thoughts and if you are not into that, do not go there! Just wanted to say, I couldn’t agree more with your post. Good day 🙂

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